When you’re deep in your grief—and even when you feel like you’re finally in a good place—there’s one place that continues to be a trigger:
The Baby Aisle
Has it caught you unprepared? Did the sight of binkies, diapers, onesies, and teething toys bring on an epic meltdown?
Here’s your chance to vent.
Every time I walk through a baby aisle I have tears in my eyes. I just can’t help it. After 4 failed ET it still feels so painful.
My whiny Wednesday is about my youngest sister. She’s 22, married for two years, and only six months ago she said they were going to wait for a baby and spend time traveling, etc. Now she’s in her second trimester and she said as soon as they decided to try she got pregnant. No waiting, just BAM, a positive pregnancy test. Added to that is the FB invite I got this week for her gender reveal party. I have not dealt with any of this very well. She lives in a different state so I’m not around to deal with it on a daily basis, but it’s all over FB. There are other issues about this that are bothering me but those are family problems, not infertility problems. It’s just enough to add to all the emotional crap with her having a baby and me not getting the same chance. I haven’t been able to talk to her on the phone and I don’t comment on her FB posts. I’m just angry and sad, but every day I try to focus on what is good about my life. It’s still a struggle no matter what I do.
When my younger sister became pregnant it was really difficult. Her pregnancy was around the same time I let go of my dream to become a mother. People told me that when my nephew is born – I wouldn’t hurt as much and would be ‘in love’ with him . . . They lied! My grief became overwhelming & I couldn’t be there to celebrate for them. I missed his first year & a half of life. And I am okay with this (although my sister is not). Now that he is a bit older & I’ve had some time, it is easier for me to be involved. But it still hurts a lot!
It’s no the baby isle anymore. Now it’s older children, when I think of the ages I might have had now.